My Flesh and Blood

Synopsis: Susan Tom is a 53-year-old divorced woman, who is now single mother to 11 adopted children, all with various special needs, ranging from having no limbs, or mental retardation, through to rare congenital skin diseases. The documentary tracks her family's life for one critical year, in which 15-year old Joe, who suffers cystic fibrosis and hyperactivity, threatens to kill either Susan or one of his siblings.

Amongst the ongoing stream of documentaries this one again stands out, primarily because of its almost shocking subject matter. After recovering from the amazement that any sane person could adopt eleven kids, we are then forced to confront the fact that all these kids are disabled to some degree or another. Karsh and his crew filmed in the Tom home for one year with nearly complete access to everything going on within the house. This gives the film an unnerving intimacy and fly-on-the-wall perspective. It is especially unsettling when Joe becomes aggressive not only with his family, but also with the camera crew.

Certain of the children feature more prominently than others: Xenia, a 13-year-old girl born minus legs, who adores shoes (which she wears on her hands) and participates in life with an enthusiasm one finds scarcely believable; Faith, an 8-year old whose was horrendously burnt as a baby but who retains a loving and positive personality; Anthony a 19-year-old with a congenital skin disease which causes him agony and will lead to his premature death. And of course Joe, who is Susan's biggest challenge.

Apart from an initial aversion to the graininess (uh-oh, another video doc!), I was soon drawn into the strangely compelling story, which filled me alternately with compassion, horror, admiration and astonishment. Karsh treats the children with great affection, and all have a splendid opportunity to convey their feelings and thoughts, as does Susan who must surely be some sort of saint! (or does she have deeper underlying motives, which are alluded to but could have been more strongly delved into?).

With recent debates about intensive care for extremely premature babies who end up disabled in mind I certainly mulled long and hard about these kids who, without an earth mother like Susan, would surely be the rejected and neglected souls of our society. But what strikes one so forcibly is the joie de vivre that most of them displayed. Who are we to pass judgement upon what lives are worth living, and what should be terminated? This of course can only lead to the sort of self-searching that makes viewers of such films surely wonder what they have to complain about in life.

But enough philosophising. In short, this is another amazing documentary that everyone would do well to see, if only to remind ourselves how bloody lucky we are!

 

 

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