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Australia 2006
Directed by
Rohan Michael Hoole
90 minutes
Rated MA

Reviewed by
Bernard Hemingway
0 stars

Court of Lonely Royals

Although this independently-produced feature comes within the “low budget” field, one can only wish that whoever ponied up the $200,000 required to make it had kept their hands in their pockets and it had remained the sad fantasy of writer, director and producer Rohan Hoole.

Court Of The Lonely Royals tells the story of a couple of young contract killers, one male, one female, who murder their victims by exploiting their weaknesses. Mixing sexual titillation, drug-taking with murder and existential alienation in a desperate attempt to be hip that is completely sophmoric in its pretension, it is only dragged further into the abyss by its awful script and equally awful acting. And whatever skills the technical crew have brought to bear to dignify this nonsense are completely wasted given the drabness of the directing, Hoole being as unqualified in this department as he is in scriptwriting. At best one could write this off as a learning experience for those involved but unless you want to learn what not to do in making a film there is no other reason to watch this truly awful film.

DVD Extras: Director's Commentary; Making of featurette; Theatrical trailer. 

Available from: Madman




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